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If you have just been dumped by your girlfriend, you are probably dealing with many emotions right now, one of which may be a strong desire to win her back. While this is a totally normal process to go through after a breakup, you need to first evaluate if the relationship is worth saving before trying to get her back. The fact is that many guys prefer to stay in a mediocre relationship because it is easier than trying to put the time and effort into looking for someone who is a better match.
If your ex was not your true soul mate, then moving on would be the smarter thing to do, however, if she had the potential of being a lifelong partner and you know that she is worth fighting for, then you can use these 5 strategies to help you win back your ex-girlfriend.
Strategy #1 – Determine if Your Ex Still Loves You
Before attempting a reconciliation with your ex-girlfriend you need to determine if she still loves you. Girls tend to be unpredictable at times and can act in haste when their feelings get hurt. If your ex-girlfriend broke up with you during a heated argument that was over a minor issue, then she most likely acted out on impulse and you stand a very good chance of getting her back.
Strategy #2 – Let Her Come to You
If your ex-girlfriend acted in haste then she did not really mean to break up with you and the best thing to do is to let her to come you. Do not send her a ton of text messages or try calling her every ten minutes to see if she is home or out with someone else. You do not want to come across like you are desperate or stalking her in any way as you will only push her away further. Instead, you need to allow her time to calm down so she can come to realize that she made a mistake and will want to come back to you.
Strategy #3 – Evaluate Yourself and Make a Change
During this time, you will also want to assess your own behaviour leading up to the breakup. Often times, when a guy wants to win the affection of a girl, he will be on his best behaviour and will try to impress her when they first meet and start going out. Then, as the relationship gets comfortable, the guy will stop caring about how he acts or looks around his girlfriend.
Take a look at yourself, did you slip into a “lazy” mode because you had already “won” your girl? Did you stop buying her flowers, opening the door for her or giving her compliments? If so, you need to make some changes by going back to doing the things you did when you first wanted to impress your girl. You don’t want to just do this to get her back, but also continue after you are back together. Show her that she is worth your time and she will do the same for you in return.
Strategy #4 – Be Social
When you get a chance, try to stay in her social circle, continue going to the same parties and events that you both used to go to when you were together. This will not only show that you have no problem being around her but that you are still available. When you do see her, be friendly and don’t be afraid to say hello.
You can judge from her reaction if she is open to further discussion. If she says hello back, then continue talking to her on a friendly basis, do not start bringing up the past or remind her of the negative things that caused the breakup. You can choose pleasant topics that were once a common bond for the two of you. By doing this you will remind her of why she was drawn to you in the first place.
Strategy #5 – Be Nostalgic
You can help your ex-girlfriend remember the good old times by wearing her favorite cologne or a shirt that she gave you. These are just subtle ways you can remind her of the better times you had together. When she does take notice of you, be sure to give her some of your attention while you are spending time with your friends.
You can chat with other girls during the evening, but do not flirt with them, simply engage in conversation. If your ex sees other girls talking to you she will be reminded that you are still a catch and that there is a risk of losing you to someone else if she doesn’t try to make amends with you. You do not want to create jealousy, this will only make your ex resentful toward you and confirm to her that she made the right decision to break up with you.
write by Calliope